The Little Prince
Richard Burton featuring William Simpson / Audio CD (January 18, 1975)
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Disc: 1 1. 1/5: Reindeer on menu; Nicole Kidman twitches for "Bewitched" 2. 1/12: Richard Gere wins "Foot-in-Mouth" award; painted sheep compose poetry 3. 1/19: Models becoming less curvaceous; billboards eavesdrop on cars 4. 1/26: Man smuggles monkeys in pants; man legally changes name to "Jack Ass" 5. 2/2: Escalator-riding craze hits Cambodia; film explains humans to extra-terrestrials 6. 2/9: Candidates misspell party names; witch sued over bad spells 7. 2/16: Vacuum cleaners emulate cruise missiles; man uses birdseed to rob bank 8. 2/23: Road workers misspell signs; artist needs naked people covered in plaster 9. 3/2: "Pervert of the Thong" arrested; exclusive interview with Michael Jackson 10. 3/9: 1,000 gallons of tequila spill into sewer system; bird songs hit pop charts 11. 3/16: Artist plans to marry herself; bill-collector wears kilt to scare debtors 12. 3/23: Suicidal man sues over defective rope; police investigate jelly donuts 13. 3/30: Talking washing machines; feds respond to theft of peanut butter sandwich 14. 4/6: World's-longest gum-wrapper chain; Britney Spears' moldy glass on display 15. 4/13: Man cracks concrete blocks with groin; flatulent museum display 16. 4/20: Bank robbers booty explodes in pants; man sues over loose belt 17. 4/27: Man eats pigeon food; CD features sounds of famous people's tombs 18. 5/4: Man eats glass for living; man sues over verbally-abusive mynah bird 19. 5/11: Man drops false teeth down cleavage; gold-coated waste as lucky charms 20. 5/18: Man wears lingerie to make crime undetectable; robbers wear only underwear 21. 5/25: Ant-killing illegal in Germany; kids steal public playground 22. 6/1: Monkeys can't write Shakespeare; nightclub employs naked security guards 23. 6/8: Scientists confirm flies can fly; market sells Jesus sandals 24. 6/15: Ketchup-covered man in court; train conductors hold head-bashing contest |
Disc: 2 1. 6/29: Guitarist uses 100 effects pedals; topless woman hangs upside-down from train 2. 7/6: Shoplifter uses bees to escape; zoo stops renting rifles to visitors 3. 7/13: Boy doesn't like school, calls police; teddy bear mistaken as roommate 4. 7/20: Mice fall from restaurant ceiling into food; 9-day-old baby at AC/DC concert 5. 7/27: Man sues over falling dog food bowls; world's first underwater post office 6. 8/3: School asks parents to donate toilet paper; elderly woman cooks topless 7. 8/10: Woman swallows fork while retrieving cockroach; trash dump wedding 8. 8/17: Gadget translates dog & cat sounds; musicians fight over sour notes 9. 8/24: Hormel sues spam-blocking programs; gas station employs topless attendants 10. 8/31: Diaper-changing violation; soldier steals pastries; pharmacy argument 11. 9/7: Flash Mobs sweep globe; man riding motorized barstool chased by police 12. 9/14: Travelers denied entry after failing Beatles quiz; Bosnia outlaws blond jokes 13. 9/21: Body odor outlawed for city employees; father zaps daughter's boyfriend 14. 9/28: Blacksmith makes decoy policemen; suitcase found full of baboon noses 15. 10/5: Romanian minister bans sexy weather girls; women strip at stoplights 16. 10/12: Man blames bee & Justin Timberlake for crash: parrot as car payment 17. 11/2: Guinea pig spy update; man smuggles snakes in pant legs 18. 11/9: Flatulence tax on farm animals; potato chip sorting machine uncovers bombs 19. 11/16: A look at "ear worms," those songs you can't get out of your head! 20. 11/23: Topless women protest rising electricity rates; cabbage head as gun silencer 21. 11/30: Man says name is copyrighted; flatulent toy dog sets off explosive alarms 22. 12/7: Food-scented body lotion; restaurant charges extra for unfinished meals 23. 12/14: World's largest necktie soiled by pigeons; skunk spray on Christmas trees |
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Disc: 1 1. 1/6: Poets read works in baboon zoo enclosure; most-hated holiday #1 songs 2. 1/13: Afroman as drug-deterrent; movie effects secrets; "Hey William!" interview 3. 1/20: Man drives 15,000 miles naked; man wants to be buried with porno videos 4. 1/27: "Star Wars" fans in line four months early; judge plays with toilet toy in court 5. 2/3: Strippers wear magnetic underwear to catch euros; Monopoly money payment 6. 2/10: Man steals $1 mil using "3 Stooges" law firm name; eating euros 7. 2/17: Man changes name to Zipardee Doodah; guard fish scares away burglar 8. 2/24: Britney Spears' unwashed glass tours Germany; mailman hides 1,000 letters 9. 3/3: Man changes name to Hong Kong Phooey; priest fined over church bells tape 10. 3/10: UK license plates recalled over poo; first "Demented News" report 11. 3/17: Program predicts roadmap refolding; rhesus monkey invasion 12. 3/24: Man changes name to Playstation 2; garden gnomes earn legal rights 13. 3/31: Mariah Carey fans think they can stay with her; driver has snake in pants 14. 4/7: Ventriloquist dummy threatens marriage; shoe-sniffing thief arrested 15. 4/21: Coach bites off sparrow's head; Popsicle Phil in line for "Star Wars" 16. 4/28: Edible Ballot Society makes milkshakes; sewage into snow 17. 5/5: House collapses to reveal Elvis; grandma sues over voice on rap song 18. 5/12: Yahoo yodeller sues; listening to the radio over the iron 19. 5/26: Dinosaurs recorded on prehistoric leaves; Musical Mike's "Star Wars" link 20. 6/2: Cellular ringtone symphony; shoot-out in Wackivania 21. 6/9: Thong underwear used as tickets on subway; Ozzy Osbourne & Dan Quayle 22. 6/16: Naked models form union; performance artist "licks the world" |
Disc: 2 1. 6/23: World's largest rubber-band ball; Miss Ka marries Mr. Boom 2. 6/30: Sirens send man into sexual frenzy; woman claims hair looks like Osama's 3. 7/7: Dancing linked to brain development; birdwatchers record machine gun 4. 7/14: Sweating mannequin aids designers; topless mermaid sues police 5. 7/21: Prisoners stand in squares on floor; robber wears shaving-cream disguise 6. 7/28: Topless car wash attendants; library fines man over smelly feet 7. 8/4: Man claims dogs were driving; psychic reads naked bottoms 8. 8/18: Strap-on rubber duck combats fatigue; students use laughter therapy 9. 8/25: Eminen helps fisherman catch fish; remembering rotating hedgehogs 10. 9/1: Goth-rock band plays for sheep; koala droppings sold as souvenirs 11. 9/8: Janis Joplin music scares away camels; delivery men dress as Spiderman 12. 9/15: Animal shelters dress up strays; no service for customers with visible undies 13. 9/22: Rabbit eats vinyl records; house bricks made from sewage sludge 14. 9/29: Remembering the most demented stories; Guinea pig spy 15. 10/6: Judge says slow drivers are idiots; observatory built from septic tank 16. 10/13: Pickle-jar sex line; man loses dentures, call police 17. 11/3: Pensioners strip in protest; road workers paint line over roadkill 18. 11/10: Man claims dog ate his car; odor-enhanced phones 19. 11/17: Popsicle Phil chases meteors; man takes beer keg for walk 20. 11/24: Broomstick test to find witches; Land of Dementia population count 21. 12/1: Bankrupt company pays off employees in combs; Kinky Barbie wins ruling 22. 12/8: Demented Christmas shopping tips; chocolate bra |
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Disc: 1 1. 1/7: 4th graders spend day without talking; school fines over classroom profanity 2. 1/14: upskirt filming; Scotsman threatens police after calling his kilt a skirt 3. 1/21: Man sues over disappointing Penthouse layout; thong-wearing hot dog vendor 4. 1/28: biggest-liar award; subsisting only on sunlight 5. 2/4: Vacuum cleaner saves man; juxtaposing letters to form new words 6. 2/11: Enya vs. Fugees; Enya vs. Eminem 7. 2/18: Stripper trying to write-off implants; breasts as lethal weapons 8. 3/4: $200 bill with Bush's portrait; beer song forbidden; alarm clock shooting 9. 3/11: Happiness hazardous to health; pigeons in pants; bird eggs in underwear 10. 3/18: Man siphons sewage from motor home; Tiffany & Debbie Gibson are friends 11. 3/25: Motorist clocked at 1,120 mph; sewage jobs; buttered toast drop 12. 4/1: James Bond theme dispute; toilet paper heist 13. 4/15: Demented Easter egg hunt; Easter Bunny interview 14. 4/29: Steve Martin art; John Lennon piano auction; Paul McCartney poetry 15. 5/6: Skimpy bathing suit wearers sued; clown custard pie insurance; savings in bra 16. 5/13: Demented job market report; alternative ATM locations 17. 5/20: Breasts enlarged without permission; Popsicle Phil & Space Station 18. 5/27: Dog-feces cake; student wears only Post-It notes; nude radio reports 19. 6/3: British dino; elderly health; senseless census; radioactive pasta 20. 6/10: Motorist can't turn, drives 5,000 miles; bus trip across street; bra chain 21. 6/17: Stolen ladder; drugstore looting; train cars stolen; email virus; casket auction 22. 6/24: Face on Mars; Klingon language lesson |
Disc: 2 1. 7/1: World's oldest working light bulb; flatulent officer investigated; toilet theater 2. 7/8: Computer inventors apologize for unintended consequences of technology 3. 7/22: 19-word city name adorns signs; Cookie Monster assaulted 4. 7/29: Bee Gees as great literary figures; reincarnated as lizard; baby sponge owl 5. 8/5: Garden gnomes liberated; Count Dracula sues over namesake wine 6. 8/12: Fireworks blow up kitchen; aliens collecting soil samples 7. 8/19: Sexy exam; celebrity cell phone covers with flashing privates; scarecrow cop 8. 8/26: Man wants to become tiger; Mimi's surf report 9. 9/2: Stripping pickpockets; armed-robber comedian; 'Bum Went Psycho' book 10. 9/9: Mom streaks at rugby game; corrupt store owners in Iran 11. 9/16: Pet snake is "Star Trek" fan; man rejuvenated after shock on toilet 12. 9/23: Yearbook censors Britney Spears' bare midriff; lactation drug on the loose 13. 9/30: Knight ordered off the road; radio contest asks listeners to spell AC/DC 14. 10/7: Man tastes words; teen sentenced to polka music 15. 10/14: Club restroom has two toilets per stall; city named after female sex organ 16. 11/4: Flatulence filter underwear; walking 83 miles with milk bottle on head 17. 11/11: Showing survival videos to fish; potato as sex symbol 18. 11/18: Madonna won't oink; Britney music scares wild pigs; Thanksgiving recipe 19. 11/25: Car ticketed after yellow lines painted under it; saunas cause stupidity 20. 12/2: Shopping-mall Santas go to tech school; naked bike riding lady nude in court 21. 12/16: "Ho-ho-ho" a no-no; warped toys |
Contact Whimsical Will as he now has e-mail, or write c/o The Demento Society, or check out Will's Website!!
Will now has two CDs and tapes of the best of his break-in interviews since 1982 and Demented News since 1987.
You can write Whimsical Will, c/o The Demento Society, P.O. Box 884, Culver City, CA 90232. None are available on CDNow or Amazon or anywhere else.
All of the recordings included here have aired on Dr.D. -- with many hitting No.1 on the "Funny Five"!
3-8-02: Whimsical Will released his second CD covering the best of his Demented News reports subtitled "Volume Two - Demented News 15th Anniversary Collection" from his website http://www.whimsicalwill.com/.
The highlights include the first Demented News he ever did on March 8, 1987; but that was heard only in the Los Angeles area. His Demented News rolled on only in "Smogberry Land" until Sep 6, 1992 when it became a regular feature on both the Los Angeles and National editions of the "Dr. Demento Show."
Other highlights include his infamous grammar tantrum, Klingon lessons, the funniest stories he ever did, what happens when rappers pick on Enya, Whitney Houston explodes, expose on Michael Jackson, Ride The Armegeddon, mental hospital and lawyer radio, and The Dr. Demento Story.
Side note: this is the first time my name was ever mentioned on a CD and in a CD. I am honored to be acknowledged in track 20 "Mental Hospital Radio", as well as on the inside jacket that also thanks Jeff Morris, Kevin Frank, and Princess for maintaining an exhaustive database of playlists and some Demented News transcripts in order to help Will with his research that proved invaluable to this project. This is also with eternal appreciation to Dr. Demento for his wisdom and generosity.
And don't forget, "Cutting Up Volume One - Summer Movie Adventures (1986-2001)" CD is also available, but later copies now include "Hey, Harry Potter" from last fall. His original two cassette tapes from 1995 and 1998 may still be available, many of which are not yet on his CDs.
Will's "Demented News" are dedicated to the memory of Jeff Healy (1923-1994). His sports reports (presented live each weekday on KMPC 710 in Los Angeles) were accentuated with hilarious sound bites and drop-ins called from his vast audio library. His broadcasts were the direct inspiration for the "Demented News." This volume is also dedicated to Aunt Mimi (1903-2000), a wonderful friend. Her memory lives on through the reels of hilarious recordings she left behind.
Cutting Up with Whimsical Will CD Volume Two - Demented News 15th Anniversary Collection 1987-2002
Whimsical Will / Audio CD (2002)
Available through Will's website at http://www.whimsicalwill.com!
Track Listings:
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1. The infamous "Where's The Bathroom AT?" grammar tantrum (1995) 2. "A Candid Date With The Candidates" election interview (1992) 3. Klingon Lessons; Will as "Young Spock" (1998) 4. Exploding Toilets; three-legged underwear (1998) 5. "Funny 25" pre-show festivities (1989) 6. "Funny 25" rejects (1994) 7. Cropfield circles; topless fire-breathing woman (2000) 8. Batman and Christopher Robin; Mimi's surf report (1996) 9. The Demented Truth About Michael Jackson (1993 and 1991) 10. Popsicle Phil Chasing Comets on Jupiter (1994) 11. "Scary Stuff" on Halloween (1999) 12. Three Stooges Crime; Digesting Euro Notes (2002) |
13. Ride The Armegeddon! (1989) 14. Studying The Bee Gees; Lizard Reincarnation; Owl Sponge (2001) 15. The First "Demetned News" Report (3/8/87) 16. The First National "Demetned News" Report (9/6/92) 17. "A Candid Date With The Candidates" election interview (2000) 18. Valentines and Apologies To My Irish Princess, Enya (2001) 19. Mary Tyler Moore Goes Bad; Whitney Houston Explodes (1995, 1991) 20. Mental Hospital Radio; The "Lawyer Looney Show" (1996) 21. Mauled At The Mall (1990) 22. North Pole Adventure (1988) 23. The Doctor Demento Story (1991) 24. Fire At Will! |
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1. Transforming Transformers (2007) 2. Hey Captain Jack! (2006) 3. A Trip To The Chocolate Factory (2005) 4. Hey Spidey! (2004) 5. Hey Hulk! (2003) 6. Cloning Around With Episode Two (2002) 7. A Trip To Jurassic Park '01 (2001) 8. Hey X-Men! (2000) 9. Hey Phantom Menace! (1999) 10. Hey Godzilla! (1998) 11. Return To Jurassic Park (1997) 12. Mr. Twister (1996) 13. Hey Batman! '95 (1995) |
14. Hittin' Bedrock (1994) 15. A Trip To Jurassic Park (1993) 16. Hey Batman! '92 (1992) 17. Hey Robin! (1991) 18. Calling Dick Tracy (1990) 19. Hey Batman! (1989) 20. Hey Roger! (1988) 21. Mr. Jaws '87 (1987) 22. Hey Howard! (1986) 23. Hey Harry Potter! (late 2001) 24. "Whimsy" - Johnny Clark 25. Hey Dickie! (1982) (where he "interviews" the man who started it all, Dickie Goodman) 26. Cloning Around With Episode Two |
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1. Hey Batman! '95 2. Hittin' Bedrock (1994) a tribute to the live-action Flinstones movie 3. A Trip To Jurassic Park (1993) 4. Hey Batman! '92 5. Hey Robin! (1991) (that's Robin Hood, not Boy Wonder) 6. Calling Dick Tracy (1990) 7. Hey Batman! (1989) 8. Hey Roger! (1988) for the movie Who Framed Roger Rabbit? 9. Mr. Jaws '87 10. Hey Howard (1986) (his first one, whose subject Howard The Duck laid an egg at the box office) 11. Mr. Insane (1991) about Saddam Hussein 12. Hey Bruce! (1986) (Springsteen that is) |
13. Christmas Cut-Up (1985) (first heard on KMET) 14. Halloween Cut-Up (1991) (first heard on KLSX) 15. Hey Dickie! (1982) (where he "interviews" the man who started it all, Dickie Goodman) 16. Mr. Comet (1985) about the arrival of a comet in early 1986 17. Mr. Medfly (1990) 18. Seat Belts (1986) 19. Election '88 20. The Doctor Demento Story (1991) 21. (earlier copies) and at the end there's a "You Are So Whimsical" - Johnny Clark 22. (1997 copies) Mr. Twister (1996) for the movie Twister 23. (1997 copies) Return to Jurassic Park (1997) |
"I've designed a full-color tape insert this time, with each copy signed and numbered. All of these recordings have aired on Dr.D.(many hit No.1 on the "Funny Five"), and are available NOWHERE ELSE but in this collection!"
"This tape is dedicated to the memory of Dickie Goodman (1934-1989), whose unique "break-in" interviews style first enjoyed commercial success in 1956 with his "Flying Saucer" recordings (with partner Bill Buchanan). Goodman is perhaps best remembered for "Mr. Jaws," which reached number four on the Billboard Hot 100 in 1975.
"Regretably, I never had the opportunity to meet with Dickie. I do hope, however, that he was aware of my work and saw fit to offer a chuckle of approval."
"Special thanks to Dr. Demento for his unwavering generosity and support."
| 1. Rock Rap (1987) - my first attempt at a themed story, working in the names of more than 200 popular music artists. 2. Black and White (1991) - inspired by Michael Jackson's "Black or White," this is my contribution to the anti-colorization movement. 3. Valley Old Lady (1982) - Mimi's first appearance on "The Doctor Demento Show"! 4. Hacker's Rap (1989) - another sordid story -- this one featuring computer jargon (and some strangely familiar "Goose Droid" music in the background). 5. You Gotta Fight (for your right to party) (1987) - The Old Philosopher meets the Beastie Boys! 6. Jabber-Wacky (1985) - an early experiment with multi-tracking in a vocalization of Lewis Carroll's classic poem. 7. TV Rap (1988) - a fractured fable told using names of TV shows. 8. Another One Makes a Fuss (1980) - my first recording to be broadcast on "The Doctor Demento Show," inspired by the relentless requests for "Weird Al's" "Another One Rides the Bus." A 16-year-old Whimsical Will -- embarrassing! 9. PAC-MAN Cleaver (1982) - evidence of my early video game addiction, this was my first recording to actually get requests! 10. Bart Simpson Rap (1990) - a collection of sound bites from "The Simpsons" set to a Herbie Hancock groove. 11. Rad (1988) - my attempt at surf-speak. Another embarrassing one. 12. Old Lady at the Beach (1986) - another Mimi appearance - this time in a bikini! 13. Hacker's Rap pt.2 (the inter-nut) (1998) - the sequel to my 1989 story, updated to include terminology from the World Wide Web. | 14. '90s Philosopher (1991) - my take on The Old Philosopher battling technology and other modern-day annoyances. 15. You Can Play My Sega (1993) - a demented demonstration of my incurable video game addiction. 16. Libya, Oh Libya (1986) - inspired by an international crisis and a Groucho Marx song. 17. Oxymoron (1991) - an early manifestation of my escalating war of the words. 18. Hiss (1986) - inspired by Prince's "Kiss," this song features a very special appearance by the mysterious Princess. 19. Beatle Rap (a day in the life) (1990) - nearly 100 titles of Beatles songs are worked into this odd-io adventure. 20. Tongue-Twister Twist (1985) - multi-tracked mouth exercises to amuse and annoy. 21. Rock Rap pt.2 (1995) - an update of my 1987 recording, with names of '90s pop artists. 22. Election Eighty-Sicks (1986) - a sampling of campaign commercial parodies. 23. Dinner Rap (1986) - three voices and a drum machine ... and very fast food. 24. The Armageddon (1990) - go for a ride on my ultimate roller coaster! 25. Record Rap (1989) - a demented tribute to the funny old phonograph, utilizing relevant vocabulary. |
This dedication by Will:
"This tape is dedicated to the memory of Dickie Goodman (1934-1989), whose unique "break-in" interviews style first enjoyed commercial success in 1956 with his "Flying Saucer" recordings (with partner Bill Buchanan). Goodman is perhaps best remembered for "Mr. Jaws," which reached number four on the Billboard Hot 100 in 1975.
"Regretably, I never had the opportunity to meet with Dickie. I do hope, however, that he was aware of my work and saw fit to offer a chuckle of approval."
"Special thanks to Dr. Demento for his unwavering generosity and support."
