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TV Died-Tuesday Night

6:00 PM

ZBS Noose--News
Are You My Daddy?--Game
Little Louse On The Prarie--Western
MBC Nudes--News
Wolf Booze--News
American Band Banned--Music
XYZ Snooze--News
The X-Men Destroy Barney The Dinosaur--Violent Cartoon
Movie--TBA
Tonight on the movie "To Be Announced:The Movie", hilarious hijinks occur when a major TV station discovers it has nothing to air at the 7:30pm slot. From the producers of the prequel "Please Stand By."
Imaginary People--Magazine
Family Affair--Comedy
Mr. French needs to explain why he's in the sack with Hazel the maid.
The Yankees-Redcoats Rematch--War Sports
originally aired in 1812, those two old rivals, the Yankees and the Redcoats, meet again. This time, the Redcoats burn Washington (Not the general, the city, dummy!)
The Brady Bunch--Comedy
Marcia loses the election for the job of the head cheerleader to someone that goes by the name of RuPaul.

6:30 PM

Access To Hollywood Denied--Gossip
Wet My Bed--Game
Let Me Hear It Once Again!--Comedy
Married...With Children--Sitcom
The Bundys duel the Bradys in a Family Feud showdown with rifles!
Buy a Hot Dog!--Game
The Not-So Insider--Gossip
Bowling For a Transmission Tuneup--Sports
Diff'rent Storks--Comedy
Each week, a different family adopts Gary Coleman.
Batman--Adventure
"Batnet": A hybrid of "Batman" and "Dragnet," with Batman in the Joe Friday role. Someone's been selling acid tabs to the youth of Gotham City, and our heroes don't know whether it's Joker, Riddler or Catwoman.
The Brady Bunch--Comedy
The Bradys go on a three-hour ship tour, run into a bad storm and get stranded on a desert island populated by other shipwrecked castaways from Gilligan's Island. They find a way to get the ship back together, but they have to decide which team returns to the mainland.

7:00 PM

60 Commercials--Ads
Make Me Murder--Game
The Groan Ranger--Western
Name That Loon--Game
Melrose Hills 90210, 2030AD--Drama
The newest soap featuring murder, rape, blackmail, kidnapping, hatred, fear, jealousy, bad chemistry, bad acting, cute women, big studs, and even a couple of gay guys in the newest soap sensation! Special Guest star: Heather Locklear.
The Mean Hornet--Adventure
Wheel of Punishment--Game
Snatch Game--Game
Let's Make a Heel--Game
Samarai Defense Lawyer--Comedy
Wheel of Fish--Game
It's a Ripoff!--Discussion
President Nixon receiving $600,000 from David Frost for a 1978 TV interview is discussed.
It's a Gas--Comedy
Takes place in a bean canning plant in Pittsburgh.
Mork and Mindy-Comedy
Mork falls for an alien...from Mexico!
Batman--Adventure
"Higher Learning". Set at GCU, in the name of diversity, Joker is made professor of Introductory Statistics. Bruce and Dick move into a 10' by 13' dorm room to keep an eye on Joker and stop his crime spree. With the aid of his fraternity brother henchmen, Joker commits one crime for each day of Heck Week.
The Brady Bunch--Comedy
The Gilligan's Island castaways returned to the mainland, and is so shocked by what's going on in society compared with what they lived with in 1964, that they repack the ship, go back to their island, and somehow convince the Bradys to return home.
Live Family Arguments--Possible Violence
The Stone Ranger--Western

7:30 PM

Where's My Pants?--Game
Hollywood Smears--Game Show
Unemployed celebrities attempt to scandalize each other on a three-story tic-tac-toe board. Contestants try to determine if their statements are "True" or "Kinda Sorta True". (thanks to John Giudice)
Easy Copy--Newsmagazine?
Forgeries are a cinch.
McSnail's Navy--Comedy
Reverse Jeopardy--Game
Hollywood Trapezoids--Game
The Hollywood Bears--Game
Homeboys In Outer Space--Comedy
The duo battles the threat of rapidly-multiplying furry tribbles that were left off after the Starship Enterprise beamed them all down to their ship.
The MacNeil/Tom Lehrer Report--News
Baseball--Sports
San Francisco Giants vs. The Village People
What If...--Discussion
See how history would be changed if Saddam Hussein never took over Kuwait.
New Math--Comedy
A a classroom sitcom starring Tom Lehrer as a math teacher trying to teach some rowdy students a new way to do math. Kinda like "Welcome Back, Kotter", but no Sweathogs here.
One Day at a Time--Comedy
Ann is shocked when she discovers that Barbara has been traded to Laverne and Shirley.
Batman--Adventure
It's wedding day as Batman and Robin finally tie the knot...uh, not to each other, but to Electrawoman and Dynagirl from Krofft Supershow who imitated them!
The Brady Bunch--Comedy
Mike's sexy long-lost daughter shows up at the Brady household claiming to be his, but before Mike could see her out, the boys get completely infatuated over her. Lisa Whelchel guest stars as Chrissy.

8:00 PM

Touched by a President--Drama
New show starring President Clinton, Paula Jones, Gennifer Flowers, and Monica Lewinsky.
Two and a Half Idiots--Sitcom
Messy James--Western
Neurotic About You--Sitcom
Due to their many headed neurosis that causes Jamie and Paul to feel insignificant, they reveal the baby was just a dream. (30 minutes and three breakdown) Thanks to Rik Anthony for that one.
King of the Pill--Cartoon
Hank gets arrested for selling "propane enjoyment" capsules
The Courtship of Eddie and Himself--Comedy
Roseanne--Comedy
Roseanne moves out when she realizes she can't act.
Who Wants to Be a Pre-Op Transexual!--Game
Regis Philbin hosts this game show where extremely effemine males compete for a chance to win free transformation into a woman. The lower-half part of the operation is not included in the prize.
Buffy the Unabomb Slayer--Camp Thriller
Movie--Comedy
"Blarney Buddies": Johnny travels to Ireland and finds out that he will improve his love-life if he kisses the Blarney Stone. He gets confused when he meets a leprechaun named Barney Stone and chases him around trying to kiss him.
America's Next Bottom Model--Reality Series
Homely women compete for a chance to be a bottom model in this competition.
Movie--Comedy Adventure
The newest sequel to Batman, this time, starring the shock jock from New York in the title role, Howard Stern in "Batman And Robin Quivers"!
That's Incredibly Boring--Reality Show
cola bottlers, toll booth attendants, and cable TV repairmen are featured.
Let's Do The Time Warp Again!--Adventure
A sci-fi adventure about teens who travel throgh time with a mad transvestite scientist.
Movie--Puppets
Tonight on "Pinocchio II", as a teenager, Pinocchio discovers something else grows when he lies.
Happy Days--Comedy
Disco fever hits the Happy Days gang as season #22 unfolds. Fonzie makes extra money dancing at a gay bar. Potsie gives everybody a break by not singing. Howard and Marion squabble over Nixon's resignation. Joanie gets arrested for streaking in the city park. Richie's teenage son joins a gang and they gun down the kids at 90210. Potsie is murdered by a humorless Danny Bonaduce over a transsexual joke. And K.C. gets a job at a lunch counter of a small airfield on a resort island of Nantucket and is caught in the middle of a feud between the two brothers who ran the joint both having the hots for her.
The A-Team--Adventure
The mercenary team plot to overthrow the programming executives at NBC for cancelling them needlessly in 1987.
CHL Hockey--Sports
The Edmonton Oilers vs. the Tickle Me Elmo dolls.
Little House on the Prarie--Drama
Boredom ensues when Mary Ingals is found out not to be blind, just lazy.
Eight is Enough--Dramedy
it was discovered that Nancy has been having an affair...with Mork the Orkan!
A Current Family Affair--Tabloid Sitcom
Buffy and Jody are caught by Mr. French when they host guest Michael Jackson in their bedroom.
Full Cave--Sitcom
Michael Jackson--Music
actually, it's about nothing. They just named their show that way so viewers will be drawn to that channel.

8:30 PM

The Old Adventures of New Christine--Sitcom
Just Shoot Susan--Comedy
F... Troop--Comedy
Spin Cycle--Comedy
The new Michael J. Fox sitcom taking place in a Chinese laundromat.
Hogan Family's Heroes-Comedy
Everybody Loves Rockmond--Sitcom

9:00 PM

Really Clueless--Comedy
New show starring Farrah Fawcett.
Meal or No Meal--Game
Punsmoke--Western
Frasier--Comedy
Frasier goes overboard on the air ranting about his popular competitior in his time slot and gets into hot water with the FCC. Howard Stern guests.
Samantha Who?--Sitcom
Christina Applegate gets confused when Heather Locklear and Alyssa Milano, as well as the ghost of Elizabeth Montgomery, all claim to be the one and only Samantha. Christina quits and calls herself Kelly Bundy again.
The Clod Squad--Crime Drama
Home Demolishment--Comedy
Tim Taylor destroys the house of The Brady Bunch so they'll never have a reunion movie again. Next stop: The Waltons.
Jailhouse Rock--Music
A weekly rock and roll show in which well known rock stars perform to prison audiences, like Johnny Cash did in the 1960's. This week-Aerosmith. Upcoming weeks include Bon Jovi, Bob Seger, Elton John, the Rolling Stones, Justin Timberlake, Britney Spears, and the season finale with Michael Jackson in what will possibly be a frequent appearance.
Sex and the Felicity--Overrated Teen Drama
Star Trek: Deep Throat Nine--Science Fiction
PSB Special Presentation Showcase--History
Tonight on the special "Henry VII and Catherine and Anne and Jane and Anne and Catherine and Catherine", it's life in merry old England during the reign of Henry VIII where heads fall like apples, especially those of his many wives. It's Henry's unique solution to the high cost of alimony!
The Dead Pet Shop--Comedy
Takes place in Britian where dead parrots are often returned and dead puppies still aren't much fun. A bunch of working stiffs also support star Eric Idle.
Monster M*A*S*H--Comedy
Monsters are recruited to serve as medical surgeons during the Koream War.
J.T. Hookerk--Police Adventure
Completely breaking from typecasting, William Shathere stars as a man in uniform wearing a shiny thing on his chest. Each week, he ensures the safety of his similarly clad peers by aiming sidearms, talking into handheld devices, and fist-fighting ugly guys. (thanks to John Giudice)
Lifeline Movie--Drama
"The Abused Wife Who Didn't Mean To Kill Her Policeman Husband in Self-Defense"
Eight is Enough--Dramedy
In "Mmmm, Bopp", a teenage David, just puberscent Tommy, and schoolkid Nicholas try out for a teeny-bopper singing trio, but they bomb. Turns out 21 years later that another threesome tried the same thing as the act was successful. Reason: the Hanson boys looked like girls!
Robin Leach Special--Reality
See the Robin Leach celebrity special "Refrigerators and Freezers Of The Rich and Famous"
Cave Improvement--Sitcom

9:30 PM

Cybill Dates Ellen--Comedy
Caroline in the Closet--Comedy
Will & Grace--Sitcom
Will & Grace do nothing together for 30 minutes because they can't find male dates.
Blew Carey--Comedy
The Streak--Comedy
A sitcom about a fast nude runner in 1974 about college life in Southern California.
The Blunder Years-Comedy
Third Boulder From The Sun--Sitcom

10:00 PM

The Ex-Wives Files--Drama
New show starring Larry King who is visited by all his wives.
Law & Order: Rest Home Unit--Elderly Drama
Death Valley Daze--Western
The Naked Friends--Comedy
Boston Illegal--Drama
The X-Files--Sci-Fi Drama
The future of the X-Files project is jeopardized after Mulder secretly infiltrates the government cover-up of the long-lasting benefits of blue-colored food to their citizens. George Carlin demands in a rally that the government give the people the blue food!
Mucus Will Be, M.D.--Medical Drama?
NYPD Blue--Crime Drama
During a robbery, a robber tells a flasher to stick it up.
John Belushi: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze & Pills--True Hollywood Tale
Flea City--Drama
Movie--Sci-Fi
"The Day The Earth Didn't Move Around Very Much": Johnny has to appear in court for numerous crimes he had committed. Johnny explains that because his VCR was blinking 12:00, he thought time had frozen. Johnny walked around Aron city and everywhere he went, people froze for different reasons only supporting Johnny's theory of time freezing.
Star Drek: Annexed Variation--Science Fiction Space Opera
Rikirk has to lay off the frosted donuts when his estranged father whips him at Multi-Grav Horseshoes and his date learns he hasn't been in a single fight scene for three seasons. (thanks to John Giudice)
Movie--Comedy
"Naked Exposition." Traci Lords.
N.Y.P.D. Existential Blues--Crime Drama
About cops philosophing about existentialism and contains some adult language and nudity.
Movie--Drama
the family movie "Benji Foams At The Mouth"
Coach--Comedy
Coach Fox takes on a new challenge by coaching a football team entirely composed of chimpanzees.
Kojak--Crime Drama
In a change of pace episode, Detective Kojak decides to get a hairpiece.
Siskel and Ebert at the Elvis Movies--Discussion
Gene and Roger examine "Clambake" and "It Happened at the World's Fair."
Eight is Enough--Dramedy
In their annual "Seven Days in February, 1977", Joanie, Susan, and Nancy each have dates whose description is spookingly similar to each other. It was later discovered that one man has been three-timing the girls, and skips town before they get a chance to get even. Former Brady Bunch teen Barry Williams guest starred.
Firing Squad--Audience Participation
see the riflemen from Colombia and Argentina execute Ameirca's Most Wanted celebrities we can all live without: First up: Leona Helmsley
CSI: Bedrock--Crime Lab Drama

10:30 PM

Mad About Veronica--Comedy
Suddenly Boozin'--Comedy
Stars Boris Keltsin

11:00 PM

News--News
Roy Mister Rogers--Western
Slayton Place--Serial?
Ailing Nation--Science Friction
Refugees from another galaxy take up residence in Los Angeles, bringing their hairless, spotted bodies, queer customs, and indecipherable language. No one in California notices anything odd. (thanks to John Giudice)
Pencils Galore!--Documentary
Part 23 of 123: Why Pencils Are Made of Wood.
SHL Hockey--Sports
Calgary Flames at James Brown and His Flames
Under Scrutiny With Whimsical Will--Demented News
A news show where he spends 30 minutes with one demented topic expanded as if it really needed to.
Hart to Hart--Crime Drama
Jonathan does all the dirty work while Jennifer sees a manucurist.
Chinatown Beach--Drama
Jack Nicholson and Faye Dunaway get stranded at a Vietnam Beach during the Vietnam war.
Jerry Springer--Full-Contact Discussion
Topic: "Transsexual Space Aliens Who Date Extraterrestrial Bisexuals"
Eight is Enough--Dramedy
Sweeps time again, and this time, Susan's daycare job is a handful: the future kids of Beverly Hills 90210!
Beavis and Mutthead--Crude Comedy

11:30 PM

Movie--Comedy
"The Three Stooges Go To Harvard"
Arsenio Mall--Shopping Variety
Dick Clark's Rockin' Memorial Day--Music
Nightline--News
ABC where tonight on "Nightline", Ted Koppel comes out and tells the audience that he's really David Letterman opposing himself on CBS he taped earlier that same day.
Movie--Comedy
"Abbott and Costello Meet The Facts of Life"
Violent Movie Of The Week--Crime Drama
Robert Blake plays a mad consumer who gets left with a lemon of a car that caused the death of his wife and child. Now, he's a vengeful maniac, stalking the city and destroying other people's cars! Michael Jackson helps out.
The Midnight Star--Tabloid News
A nightly tabloid show produced by the friends of "Weird Al"
The Great Luke Ski--Comedy

12:00 MID

Politically Incorrect--Discussion
Scheduled: Adolf Hitler, Louis Farakkhan, Marge Schott, and Malcolm X join Bill Maher in a discussion of the day's events.
Movie--Comedy?
"I Know Who You Did Last Summer" (1998) -- Bill Clinton, Monica Lewinsky, Linda Tripp, Kenneth Starr
The Weird Al Show--Children
Midnight With Wildman Fisher--Variety
A 60 minute variety-comedy talk show where he sings a popular song acapello every night.
Movie--Cartoon
"I Dooby Doo": Johnny's car breaks down on the way to his Aunt Jebadissa's house. He meets up with Scooby and the gang and convinces them to give him a ride after explaining she "lives in a spooky house on widows peak". When they get there they find that Aunt Jebadissa is missing and a Ghostly Gardener is on the loose. Johnny helps the gang solve the mystery.
N.Y.P.D. Blue--Crime Drama
"Blue Hawaii" The detectives follow a lead to Hawaii, where a popular nightclub singer helps Sipowicz and Simone breakup a pineapple smuggling ring, while Medavoy and Martinez take hula lessons. Simone: Jimmy Smits. Duke Halimoko: Elvis Presley.
Jerry Springer--Full-Contact Discussion
Topic: "Plastic or Paper: Will a PPV death match decide this debate at the supermarket?"
Pillow Fights--Possible Violence

12:30 AM

1:00 AM

When Rabbits Attack--Real Life Film
See ferocious rabbits attack former president Jimmy Carter, and Elmer Fudd gets a taste of Bugs Bunny's outburst of anger after all those years of being chased.
Dork Cavett--Talk
Funny Videos--Music
Late Night Baseball--Sports

1:30 AM

Movie--Comedy
"The Three Stooges Stay Away from O.J. Simpson"
Movie--Comedy
"Abbott and Costello Make a MTV Video"

2:00 AM

Melrose Place--Drama
The Melrose gang are totally in disbelief when they find out that Peter isn't really a doctor, he just plays one on TV.
Bad Movies All Night!--Til Dawn, We Hope

2:30 AM

3:00 AM

3:30 AM

Movie--Comedy
"The Three Stooges, Texas Rangers"
Movie--Comedy
"Abbott and Costello Meet Laverne and Shirley"

4:00 AM

Stupid Unaired Pilots--Comedy

4:30 AM

5:00 AM

5:30 AM

Reruns--First Run

Schedule Occupation Grid from 6pm-6am

What channel slots are filled. The channels not listed haven't been implemented yet.
6pm-11:30pm
6pm-11pm
6pm-MID
11:30pm-6am
6pm-6:30, 7pm-12:30am
6pm-7pm, 7:30pm-11:30pm
9pm-11pm

6pm-8:30pm, 10pm-3am

6pm-6:30, 7pm-2am
6pm-7pm, 8pm-11pm
6pm-12:30am
6pm-6:30, 7pm-2am
6:30pm-11pm
6pm-11:30pm
11:30pm-5:30am
7:30pm-11pm
6:30pm-7pm
6pm-6:30, 7pm-11:30pm
6pm-7pm, 8pm-11pm, 4am-6am

6pm-2am
6pm-8:30pm, 10pm-3am
7:30pm-MID

7:30pm-8pm, 9pm-11:30pm
7pm-1:30am
8pm-1:30am
6pm-7pm, 8pm-9pm
7pm-7:30pm, 11:30pm-12:30am, 2am-6am
7pm-8pm, 9pm-11pm
7pm-2am
8pm-2am
6pm-11pm
6:30pm-1am
6pm-10am, 1am-4:30am
8pm-MID
10pm-1am
6pm-MID
7pm-11pm, MID-1am
7pm-11pm
8pm-8:30pm, 11pm-11:30pm
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