TV Died -- Friday Night

Notice: How To Tip The Webmaster.

You are at the section TV Died

TV Died-Friday Night

6:00 PM

ZBS Full Contact News--News

Funsmoke--Western

MBC Championship News--News

Wolf Fast Action News--News

American Blandstand--Music

XYZ Pro News--News

The X-Men Meet The Y-Women!--Violent Cartoon

Movie--Comedy Adventure
In the movie "Young Einstein II: Serious Trouble", a 1998 flick, Yahoo Serious returns as a crazed scientist bent on tofu.

Sesame Seeds--Instructional

UBA Basketball--Sports
The Chicago Bulls vs. The Spice Girls.

VideoGame Sportsworld!--Game
see the TV event of the year "Intellivision World Championship Boxing"

Stanley Spadowski's Clubhouse--Children
Stanley eats an orange and watches Bonanaza.

Step by Step--Brady Bunch Ripoff
A class action lawsuit is filed on behalf of their clients by their lawyer that the family stole their idea of having a father with three children marry a mother with three children.

Friday Night Football--Sports
Dandy Don Meredith hums a medley of Beatle tunes while Frank Gifford talks about his former job as a Chippendale, O.J. Simpson brags about being the only football player to jump over luggage in an airport, all this while Howard Cosell keeps interrupting them with all those amazing worthless NFL statistics. Guest sportscaster Joe Namath discusses 1001 ways to use pantyhose. If tonight's game between Tampa Bay and the New Your Jets don't exicite you, as neither of those two teams often make the playoffs, maybe this sportscaster gabfest will keep you tuned in.

The Brady Bunch--Comedy
I want my MTV is the rage as Bobby and Cindy lead a city-wide campaign to get their monopolistic cable company to get the cable channel on their system.

6:30 PM

What the Heck Are You Waiting For?--Comedy

Come In For a Stale Sandwich!--Game

Eggs Over Easy--Senior Cooking

Bowling For Peanuts--Sports

Family Bow Ties--Comedy

The Brady Bunch--Comedy
Greg tries once again for a singing career, but after looking at George Michael's butt, he gives up, saying his butt just won't help sell his music.

7:00 PM

60 Osmonds--Public Service

The Mild Mild West--Western

Name That Cartoon--Game

Beverly Hills 90210--Drama
David's record career rides high after he sells his soul to Satan, then crashes and burns.

Madonna Reed--Comedy

Wheel of Revenge!--Game
Where victims get back by spinning the wheel selecting a corrputive act to perform on the offender.

Let's Make a Seal--Game

How To Assemble Aircraft Carriers At Home--Instructional

Merv Griffin Show--Variety
Tony Randall guests for the 987th time. Yawn.

Wheel of Fish--Game
It's everyone's favorite game show, about fish!

It's a Ripoff!--Discussion
The Purchase of Manhattan from the Indians for $24,000 is the subject.

Pencil Neck Geek--Drama
A drama about a geek in his childhood who gets beat up all the time by kid bully Fred Blassie.

They're Great Pumpkins, Charlie Brown!--Cartoon
Lucy gets implants.

Stork and Mindy-Comedy

America's Least Wanted--Reality Crime
Profiles of people nobody cares about.

The Brady Bunch--Comedy
Mike comes out as a gay when Carol confronts his inability to consumate their relationship. Mike then moves out and into an apartment with his lover.

7:30 PM

Name That Stain--Game
Special Celebrity Guest: Monica Lewinski

The Shady Bunch--Sitcom

Jeopardy of Fortune--Game

The Hollywood Squirrels--Game

The MacNeal/David Tanny Report--News

What If...--Discussion
See how history would be changed if James Dean never learned had a car to drive.

An Earache, My Eye!--Comedy
Stars a truant teen trying to get out of high school, but his militant father refuses to let him have his way and begin his heavy-metal rock career.

The Muppets--Puppets
Miss Piggy gets too angry at Kermit and Bobbitizes him.

Just The Ten Of I--Comedy
A schitzophernic takes on ten personalities. Former title "Eight I's Is Enough", but he since added two more, forcing the title to be changed.

Batman--Adventure
Batman and Robin fight their ultimate notorious villian, the ABC Programmer, from cancelling their series but fail and end up in rerun heaven.

The Brady Bunch--Comedy
The Rodney King verdict results in a mass riot as even the Brady's home gets trashed by several looters during the city-wide riots. Peter, who was with the National Guard, finds a female looter and tries to change her evil ways.

8:00 PM

Bananaz--Western

Mad About Seinfeld--Comedy

Ninny and The Professor--Sitcom

Two of a Kind--Cute Comedy
The Olsen twin sisters get into a terrible feud over which one is cuter.

Turkey Theatre--Movies
Movies so dreadful that you wouldn't be caught watching them with friends and family...let alone yourself in private. This week's film: "Ishtar", starring Dustin Hoffman. Coming attractions: "Heaven's Gate", "Waterworld", "Cleopatra", "Plan 9 From Outer Space", "The Adventures of Pluto Nash", "Gigli" (with Ben and J-LO), and "Howard The Duck".

Buffy the Microsoft Slayer--Camp Thriller

Movie--Comedy Adventure
In the movie "Animal Boat" or "The Boston Tea Party", a 1774 flick, a bunch of wild and crazy guys hold an "Indian" party aboard a British ship and have a "tea fight". John Belushi stars.

Catherine Was Great--Sitcom
Empress Catherine was a wild swinging Russian Czarina as she gets into uniforms, leather, S&M, etc. before they became fashionable.

NBA Basketball--Sports
Sacramento Kings vs. Burger King

TV's Censored Bloopers, Practical Jokes, Commercials, Foulups, Bleeps, Blunders, Ripoffs, Slips, Trips, Falls, Giggles, Goofs, and Obscene Gestures"--Variety
nothing unusual happens.

I Get Weird!--Game
A weekly contest to see who gets the weirdest!

Full House Gets Condemned--Comedy
The Tanners are left homeless.

The Dukes Of Hazzard--Adventure
39 Yugos are smashed as Bo and Luke race against Smokey (Jackie Gleason), and both manage to ruin the most cars in the shortest time ever.

The Little House On The Prarie Burns To The Ground--Drama

Town Talk with George Newman--Discussion
Eskimo pies. Do they need to be frozen?

Eight is Enough--Dramedy
Nicholas in college tries to lure Janet Jackson to a campus back-to-school concert, but when an alternate is used, Nicholas gets chased out by the whole staff...another Jackson showed up in her place instead...LaToya!

Let's Go To A Movie--Live Footage

Sanrock and Son--Sitcom

8:30 PM

Family Matters--Comedy?!?
Urkel gets gunned down by Tupac Shakir after making a bad rap video.

Suddenly Seinfeld--Comedy

The Pork Ridge Family--Fat Singing Comedy

Boy Meets Boy--Teenage Gay Comedy
Boy falls in love with ... another boy!

The Boulder Bunch--Sitcom

9:00 PM

The Granny--Comedy
A very old Fran Dresher is the baby sitter for two obnoxious teen pranksters who continually mimic her annoying voice and turn up her hearing aid. Thanks to Donald Kapica.

Marshall Dill Pickle--Western

Just Shoot Seinfeld--Comedy

The X-Files--Sci-Fi Drama
Mulder and Scully search for the truth when an anthropologist discovers what could be the frozen remains of The Flintstones.

Tomb 222--Decomposing Classroom Comedy

The Brady Bunch--Adult Family Comedy
The Bradys finally find their lost dog Tiger...dating a transvestite Lassie!

Star Trek: Boyager--Space Adventure
Michael Jackson beams abord, thinking they are all boys on the spaceship!

You Can't Con Edison--History
Thomas grows up to be a great inventor. He gets credited with inventing the light bulb, the radio tube, the movie projector, the phonograph and the electric bill.

Fake People--Magazine

Monty Python's Flying Circus--Comedy

Cheers--Comedy
Rebecca finally gets horizontal with Sam, when suddenly Diane returns with a baby and says "meet Sam Jr."

Quantum Leap--Adventure
Sam Beckett is transported into the body of Fred Silverman and tries to get BJ and the Bear renewed.

International Coughing Championships--Sports

Motel--Drama
Amazing how Aaron Spelling can combine his shows "The Love Boat" with Condonminium and wind up with one of the most successful mindless series ever.

Cable War Network: All War All the Time--News
Topic of Discussion. How terrorists could save money by blowing up Yugos instead of Mercedes Benzes. Thanks to Donald Kapica.

Eight is Enough--Dramedy
Nicholas battles against his high-school bully to gain the attention of the hottest chick in school, but after Nicholas wins, he soon pays the price as his girlfriend dries him up, stiffs him, and dumps him. Shannen Doherty guest stars.

The Rockford Slates--Crime Drama

9:30 PM

Candied Camera--Comedy
The producers get to eat their equipment. hosted by Suzanne Funt and Peter Somers.

Seinfeld Behaving Badly--Comedy

The Mauled Couple--Comedy?

Sabrina and The Lesbian Witches--Bewitching Comedy
Sabrina is in shock when she discovers that her aunts raising her are not really her aunts, but a lesbian couple.

The Odd Couple--Comedy
Felix and Oscar settle their differences...in a boxing match. Don King co-stars.

10:00 PM

Nash Bridges--Crime Drama
Nash (Don Johnson) puts Phillip Michael Thomas's picture on the side of milk cartons.

Draggin' Train--Western

Seinfeld's Closet--Comedy

The X-Files--Sci-Fi Drama
The agents search for answers when a middle-aged man uses a technology of the future to make boys fall in love....with him! Michael Jackson guest stars.

Crud, American Style--Comedy

Boy George: A Nightmare Descent Into Booze & Pills--True Hollywood Tale

Movie--Music
"The Man Who Would Be King" (1979) Made-for-TV remake of the classic drama, this time, a Mississippi truck driver who goes to New York and becomes the king of Disco.

Cosmos--Documentary
Carl Sagan ponders the meaning of the songs of Perry Como after listening to his recordings billions and billions of times.

NBA Basketball--Sports
N.Y. Knicks vs. Stevie Nicks

Joe's Garage--Music Documentary
A musical drama serial chronicling the beginnings and career of multi-instrumentalist genius, Frank Zappa, played by Val Kilmer.

Seinfeld-Comedy
Kramer decides to give up sex forever, but finds it impossible. He finally decides to taper off by dating only dwarfs. (submitted by Apollonius)

Miami Vice--Crime Drama
Ricky Ricardo Jr. guests as a Cuban bandleader carrying on his late father's job and Crockett and Tubbs scheme to get on his show with bad pop singing.

Dull-us--Drama
J.R. Ewing and Cliff Barnes do nothing to each other for 60 minutes.

Eight is Enough--Dramedy
Susan has her eighth child with Merle and they both consider getting a spinoff of their Dad's main show. They can't figure out what to name it...the baby, that is.

Quarry, M.E.--Medical Drama

10:30 PM

The Naked Seinfeld--Comedy

11:00 PM

News--News

The Bug Valley--Western

The Ghost of Mrs. Muir--Spooky Comedy

So-Great Performances--Performing Arts?

Under Scrutiny With Whimsical Will--Demented News
A news show where he spends 30 minutes with one demented topic expanded as if it really needed to.

A.M.A. Gladiators--Quasi-Sports
Forcep and Suture take on new challengers in High Speed Neurosurgery. Bedpan and Trode prepare to shatter some ribs in Tag Team Power CPR. (thanks to John Giudice)

Quincy--Drama
Questions need to be answered when Quincy is found with his pants down. Part 1 of 2 parts.

Jerry Springer--Full-Contact Discussion
Topic: "My 10-Year-Old Daughter Wants To Become a Spice Girl!"

Eight is Enough--Dramedy
Nicholas runs away to San Diego, this time, he gets a job as a dishwasher for a racist upscale golf course. After some cocaine makes its way onto the scene, Nicholas is suspected and is fired, but he gets even when he plants the coke in the pockets of the supremacist head waiter. Eventually, Nicholas runs back to Sacramento after learning what cocaine was.

Beahead and Visbutt--Crude Comedy

11:30 PM

Movie--Comedy
"The Three Stooges Meet Dave, Jay and Ted"

Arsenio Ball--Variety

Dick Clark's Rockin' Christmas Eve--Music

Frightline--News
Ted Koppell is possessed by a demon and Dracula sucks the blood out of his guests.

Movie--Comedy
"Abbott and Costello Go To Venus"

Samarai Hotel Clerk--Comedy

Movie--Comedy
Tonight on the movie "Big Mac Meets the Whopper", teenage studs compete in the burger, beer, and sex marathon and destroy the city of Palm Beach, Florida. Timothy Bottoms, Shannen Doherty, and a whole bunch of brat pack rats also star.

The Midnight Star--Tabloid News
A nightly tabloid show produced by the friends of "Weird Al"

Lester McFwapp--Comedy

Mary Hartman, Mary Hartman--Comedy
Mary Mary learns learns that that she she has has a a double double in in Walla Walla Walla Walla Washington Washington (Repeat Repeat)

You're The New Van Halen Lead Singer!--Music Game
Each week, Eddie Van Halen chooses from three contestants hoping to be selected as the lead singer of Van Halen for the upcoming week. Contestants this week include all three members of the teen group Hanson.

12:00 MID

Politically Incorrect--Discussion
Scheduled: Arnold Schwarzenegger, Sylvester Stallone, Bruce Willis, and Richard Simmons join Bill Maher in a futile attempt at a discussion of the day's events.

Mad Dogs and Englishmen--Documentary
Ken Russell's intriguing documentary about famous English mad dog fanciers, from Disraeli and Lloyd George to Clement Attlee and Michael Caine.

The Weird Al Show--Children

Midnight With Wildman Fisher--Variety
A 60 minute variety-comedy talk show where he sings a popular song acapello every night.

Midnight Court--Comedy

Eight is Enough--Dramedy
David and his wife adopt eight children of their own, but the family is in shock...he adopted the Spice Girls and the Hanson boys!

What's My Sexual Orientation?--Adult Game

12:30 AM

Fridays--Lame Saturday Night Live Ripoff
How in the world did this dud ever last 18 years? Oh? Now I know. They copied Saturday Night Live, which too decame dull and boring, yet lasted for over 25 years!

Have Sex With Dr. Ruth--Discussion

0:00 AM

0:30 AM

1:00 AM

Not Quite In Concert--Bad Rock Band Performance

Funny Videos--Music

1:30 AM

Movie--Comedy
"The Three Stooges Get Elected To The White House"

NGTV Network--Comedy
Sketch comedy based around a television station run by computer nerds.

Movie--Comedy
"Abbott and Costello Master Their Own Domains"

2:00 AM

Bad Movies All Night!--Til Dawn, We Hope

2:30 AM

The Worst of Saturday Night Live--Skitcom
Scheduled: Fear trashes the studio while Charles Rocket and Norm Macdonald engage in a swearing contest.

3:00 AM

3:30 AM

Movie--Comedy
"The Three Stooges Meet Manny, Moe and Jack"