08-11-1982: In a segment of the Museum of the Hard-to-Believe, Stagehand Jimmy Fitzgerald portrays Dale Butterworth, the Incredible Indecision Man who still can't make up his mind regarding the Pepsi Challenge from 1976.
08-11-1986: Actor Beverly D'Angelo performs "Satisfaction" and "Dog in the Back" on her concertina.
08-11-1987: "What's Hal Wearing" debuts; tonight's outfit: blue shirt, chinos, and brown loafers.
08-11-1987: Top Ten Unnecessary Surgical Operations - 1. Combining Large & Small Intestine into One More Manageable Medium Intestine.
08-11-1988: To add to the Bridget Jackson TV Nest Egg, Bridget does a puppet show for $676.
08-11-1988: Top Ten Slogans for Cher's New Perfume - 1. Bring out the Bono in your man.
08-11-1989: Top Ten New York City Tourist Attractions - 3. The Desperately Lonely Man's Escort Service.
08-11-1989: Viewer Mail #4: What does Hal watch on the control room monitors? Answer: Fat guys eating eggs.
08-11-1992: Dave calls Meg Parsant as street artist Miles Ludvigsen, using binoculars, draws her face on the pavement.
08-11-1992: Top Ten Perks of Dating the President - 3. Get to ride on Air Force One, if you know what I mean.
08-11-1994: As Dave reads the lineup of tomorrow's guests, the first half of the show is shown in fastforward with some scenes of Paul added (in Mexican hat, with fire extinguisher, and shirtless).
08-11-1994: Dave hands out cue cards throughout the show.
08-11-1994: Stunt bicyclist Lieber Karus rides into the theater and hands Dave the Top Ten list.
08-11-1994: Top Ten Signs You're an Overweight Cop - 2. Your ass is known as the fourth precinct.
08-11-1995: In commemoration of a baseball game the night before that had been forfeited after fans threw their complimentary baseballs onto the field, the entire audience bombards Dave with baseballs.
08-11-1995: Remote: Dave meets collectors of swizzle sticks, twigs and sticks, Liberace artifacts, pecans, and vacuum cleaners.
08-11-1995: Top Ten Other Ways To Forfeit a Baseball Game - 4. Have Dick Assman do all the pitching.
08-11-1998: "Investigating the President--Ken Starr's Evidence" bit.
08-11-1998: Because of the stock market plunge, "all night long," stock brokers jump out of the first floor window: (1) Ed DeGeorge, E. F. Hutton; (2) Garry Solomon and Brian Smith; (3) Larry Swann from Merrill Lynch chickens out, so the fire department helps him down using a three-step ladder.
08-11-1998: Celebrity Word Jumble: JERRY SEINFEDL (Answer: "Celebrity Word Jumble").
08-11-1998: Top Ten Ways the Pope Is Trying To Be More Cool.
08-11-1999: Dave's Video Collection is extra funny this time. :)
08-11-1999: Footage of the crack in a neighboring building that prompted the evacuation of the Ed Sullivan Theater this afternoon.
08-11-1999: Guest Hugh Grant apparently was in England for the solar eclipse today, and then flew over (on the Concorde?) to do the show. Also, Inky recreates the eclipse with a cue card.
08-11-1999: Top Ten Least Popular Roadside Attractions.
08-11-2000: Campaign 2000, starring Maria Pope, sponsored by Compostumbler (woman testimonial, Alan: "Pack up and ride, Grandma"). Dave continues to have problems with his right shirt collar sticking up. Paul is going to the wedding of his assistant Chris Schukei in Nebraska; he's flying United and has a half hour layover in Chicago--will he make it? Two clips of Bush saying he'll be on the show. Sponsors: Compostumbler and L.P.F.P.S. (Alan: "Get your hands off my wife!")
08-11-2000: CBS Mailbag: (1) Alan did voiceover work for Barbie? (2) "Casey Gish's (sp?) Upcoming Letters to the CBS Mailbag"--the letters are a little behind the times--the letter said "Is that your final answer?", which is about 10 months too late; (3) Dave's limo ride to work ends in an explosion; (4) Dave tells his son to straighten up, and the son turns out to be Kid Rock.
08-11-2000: Guest Vince Vaughn ("The Cell") has a few good stories.
08-11-2000: Top Ten Signs You Have a Bad Travel Agent - 4. You have to be in Nebraska for a wedding and the idiot books you on United.
08-11-2001: Happy 19th, Michelle!
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