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This Dave in History August 28

08-28-1984: Brian Knopick demonstrates why he's the bubble-gum blowing champion.

08-28-1985: Dave promotes 1-900-720-DAVE, where viewers can leave messages while the show is on vacation the following week.

08-28-1987: Participants from the Ohio State Fair bring on the show giant hog (who weighs 1,205 pounds), a giant bull (2,750 pounds), and a sculpture made of butter.

08-28-1987: Remote: Past Photos of Dave and Suggested Photo Stances (Surveillance, License, Street, Aerial, and CatScan).

08-28-1987: Top Ten Reasons I'm Retiring from Show Business - 4. Must return to home planet for sacred mating ritual.

08-28-1992: Remote: After the office fish passes away, Dave visits Fishtown, USA, and buys new fish.

08-28-1992: Top Ten Signs You're Lacking Family Values - 5. You go to your kids' school open house in something crotchless.

08-28-1995: In a themed week of reruns, viewers are allowed to watch the CBS premiere week again (probably for the first time).

08-28-1996: Composite rerun features new bits, including Dave challenging Rupert to name all of the "Rocky" movies.

08-28-1996: Composite rerun guests: Sylvester Stallone and Arnold Schwartzenegger.

08-28-1997: Champion diver Meghan Heaney-Greier goes into a water tank and holds her breath for three minutes; Dave hears the sound of home channels switching.

08-28-1997: Know Your Current Events now features a prize wheel.

08-28-1997: Top Ten Signs Your NFL Team Won't Be Doing Well This Season - 2. Quarterback spends most of his time in locker room, sacking himself.

08-28-1997: We see guys who kind of look like Paul, Warren, and Dave.

08-28-2000: "A Day in the Life of the Presidential Campaign" bit.

08-28-2000: Alan addresses Anne Heche and Ellen DeGeneres: "Let Big Red teach you how to purr again. Together we will test the limits of sexual endurance", etc. He suggests a "menage-a-Kalter" and blows them a kiss.

08-28-2000: Cameraman Dave Dorsett is back after 5 weeks; he did the conventions in Philly and LA, and the "Survivor" special.

08-28-2000: Campaign 2000, sponsored by Hairagami (the art of folding hair: short clip... only $14.99 [etc.] Alan: "Now back to you, underpants". Paul wants to drive Anna Kournikova to the show so she can be on.... Maria doesn't really have anything. Dave continues Weather Channel rant: clip of the Weather Channel with Nick Walter. Sponsor is Hairagami (clip of ComposTumbler guy: "It's just unbelievable." Alan: "I'll tell you what's unbelievable: $15 for a god damn stick!" and "Take it away, monkey ass").

08-28-2000: Dave has a bone to pick with the Weather Channel: they haven't covered the polar ice cap having melted! Also, you never see the same person twice on that channel.

08-28-2000: Dave thinks he got the West Nile virus and Lyme disease from the same tick over the weekend.

08-28-2000: Fake clip: Tiger Woods winning (Firestone?) tournament in Akron in complete darkness.

08-28-2000: In a follow-up story, Dave had three stitches on his finger. He could have them removed on the show this week (perhaps on Wednesday, the Late Show 7th anniversary).

08-28-2000: Today's Anna Kournikova play of the day features her jumping around.

08-28-2000: US Open players are apparently worried about the West Nile virus spray; sure enough, clips show them getting sprayed.

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