12-22-1982: It's another "My Dog Bob" remote: tonight, Dave and Merrill leave their holiday turkey unattended on the kitchen panel as Bob grabs the food and knocks down the home Christmas tree.
12-22-1983: Viewer Mail: A letter-writer asks what would happen if she stopped watching the soap opera "Another World"; Dave imagines food lines, riots, and suicides. After too long a time, Paul shakes Dave back to reality. Hal pipes in to Paul: "A little faster next time." Paul shouts back, "Try giving the cue a little faster."
12-22-1986: Paul does his holiday impression of Anthony Newley, as Dave shows a photo of "Late Night with David Letterman" grafitti painted on the Berlin Wall.
12-22-1987: Top Ten Elf Pick-Up Lines - 10. "I'm down here."
12-22-1988: It's Elf Night, witht he Late night staff dressed as elves undergoing "Elf Drills." Also, a live remote at a Christmas Tree Lot on 28th St., as Dave annoys both buyers and sellers.
12-22-1988: Top Ten Circus Family Holiday Traditions - 7. Count off 12 days of Christmas -- 1 day per finger.
12-22-1989: The Viewer Mail Theme is performed tonight by the Children's Bell Choir. Top Ten Ways Dogs Celebrate Christmas - 8. Leave Santa a glass of milk and a mutilated squirrel. 5. Get the puppies little toy Chuck Wagons they can chase around.
12-22-1992: Top Ten Things That'll Get You Kicked Out of a Department Store - 8. Announce over K-Mart loudspeaker that for next 15 minutes, all male shoppers can take a shot at Jaclyn Smith. 1. Licking the mannequins.
12-22-1993: Zsa Zsa Gabor defines various phobias (Mysophobia - fear of dirt), then chases Dave across the stage with a broom.
12-22-1994: Holiday Gift Items: Roseanne's Tattoo Remover, My First DNA Testing Kit, and Ed Asner "Make My Back Pretty" Doll.
12-22-1994: Top Ten Items on the North Pole Police Blotter - 4. Deranged gingerbread man arrested after several hours on street corner shouting "Eat me!"
12-22-1995: Paul performs his annual Cher impression of "O Holy Night" and Darlene Love performs the only Christmas song Dave likes, "Christmas (Baby Please Come Home)."
12-22-1995: Top Ten Pet Peeves Of U.S. Military Personnel - 9. When you ask the cook what's in the meat loaf, and he says, 'Don't ask, don't tell'.
12-22-1997: "Dave gives the turnpike toll taker some gifts" bit.
12-22-1997: Another "monosyllabic" guest: Angelo Massagli (five-year-old).
12-22-1997: Fake clip of "Titanic" special effects.
12-22-1997: Fake clip of Late Show Holiday Party.
12-22-1997: Rupert Jee presents "Rudolph, the Littlest Reindeer".
12-22-1997: The Late Show Carolers present Top Ten Least Popular Christmas Carols.
12-22-1997: Top Ten Least Popular Christmas Carols - 10. "Deck The Halls With Useless Junk / Martha Stewart Made While She Was Drunk."
12-22-1998: Dave goes into the audience and gives someone a $50 refund for a Late Show sweatshirt.
12-22-1998: Guests Charles Grodin and John Witherspoon end up staying out there till the end of the show.
12-22-1998: Ten Santas appear in the theater to present Top Ten Department Store Santa Pet Peeves.
12-22-1998: The external camera goes to Joe G's Pizza and gets Eric from New York to tape some footage for a "blockbuster" movie trailer: "Badge of Honor III".
12-22-1999: Campaign 2000 is a "high stakes game of cat and mouse". Also, Dave fields calls from the Butterball Turkey Hotline again; Dottie (Racine, WI) talks to him for quite a while.
12-22-1999: Top Ten Things a Department Store Santa Doesn't Want to Hear from a Kid (clips of kids at Bloomingdale's with Santa).
12-22-2000: [No Clinton Classic Joke] Calvert wanders out in a Santa suit and rings a bell. Dave doesn't like the wimpy bell and tells him to beat it.
12-22-2000: A holiday tradition: Paul imitates Cher singing "Oh Holy Night". He references Cher's variety show, her Christmas show, guest star William Conrad, etc.
12-22-2000: Bob Borden's Fun with Carolers: four carolers mock CATS. Also, Top Ten Signs Santa Hates You - 7. Only "gift" you received was left by Blizten on your living room carpet.
12-22-2000: CBS Mailbag Letter #1: Dave Faulkner of Orlando, FL, writes: "Hey Dave, What's your handwriting like? Sloppy, I bet." Dave responds: "Hey Dave, If I lived in Florida, I don't think I'd be accusing people of being sloppy."
12-22-2000: Kevin Costner from "last night"'s (Wednesday's) CBS airing of the "Bodyguard"--he promises never-before-told behind-scenes stories.
12-22-2000: Paul and Dave are the first to wish you the very best of this holiday season.
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